Oh my! I just wrote a long letter to you about missing you at Christmas and then it was all lost because I wasn't logged in!
I just wanted to wish you a merry christmas Malc and to let you know just how much I miss you, and especially today.
Remember when we were kids at Xmas, waking up to pillow cases filled with little bits and bobs, chocolates and satsumas. I remember those Walkie Talkies we got one year. The we'd watch morning telly in our pajamas before getting dressed later to run up to Nan's house for more presents.
I remember snow on some christmases, building snowmen and snowball fights.
Remember those awful dufflecoats we had and mittens on a string? And wellington boots! Those were the days ey.
Then we'd have the best roast dinners that Nan made...oh my, I miss them!
I miss you so much Malc, my heart has a permanent ache, it's like it's bruised and just won't mend. I try not to cry as you've seen but on days like this I just can't help it and I am again typing through tears. It just hurts so much.
It should have been me to go, not you. You deserve to be here more than I do.
I called Mother the other day but she wouldn't speak to me. Speaking via 'F' she said I would cause aggro.
I'm not sure what aggro I could cause really, I just wanted to see if she was still at that address and wish her a nice christmas. I bought her a present but I have no money to send it til the 30th.
I would hope she likes it but I fear she would give it away to someone else. I do miss her.
For whatever reason, she stopped speaking to me the day you moved into hers for a while, we'd been chatting for four years before that.
I even spent two christmases with her. Once on my own I went there for dinner and one Christmas with you there too.
We had our first christmas all together for the first time since I was most probably 15 or 16!
No matter how much she pushes me away, I still have a part of me that's empty because she doesn't want to know me.
She's always been a bit of the puzzle that's missing.
I was so happy when she was in my life.
But you know all this and I know you're sad too. Watch over her for me too ey, I still love her no matter what.
I have to post this now before the hour is up so it's posted on Xmas day,
I love you so much and miss you too,
Always your loving sis, Neek ~xXx~
MoniQueues
25th December 2009
Malc, a wonderful brother loved by this skin and blister .... more than he knew, missed daily.
An inspiration to all that met him, a honour to know him.
God rest your precious soul, in the arms of the angels ....
Love you bro xxxxxxxxxxxx
caroline wilson
14th December 2009
Malc, I wish you were here. I really need you.
You were the one person that NEVER judged me. You were always there with a sunny smile when I was down.
My heart breaks a little bit more every day, your loss is more than I can bear sometimes.
Love ya bruv.
Neek XXX
MoniQueues
23rd July 2009